The winter is tiring me out. I love it- but its a bit much, this time of year.

Ive been spending a lot of time on the computer (too much) about seven hours a day =__=' which is making me more depressed... but I cant help it. Lately Ive been sad about my life- Ive always wanted to be "different" and I long ago accepted that I really cant "settle down" with anyone, but I cant help [i]wanting[/i] to. I want to to have husband/wife, and I want to have kids, and I want to have a house, and cook, and clean, and live in that idealistic place with flowers and sunshine and happiness.

I cant stand being around other people for too long, and I'll never be in a sexual relationship (I just wont, its disgusting), I'll never be able to live with other people for an extended period of time.

Im afraid I'll never be happy, and its because of my own disposition.